


We Are In This For Eternity

by baekjuhos



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:46:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25592254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baekjuhos/pseuds/baekjuhos
Summary: Jaeyoon just wants to spend eternity with Juho.
Relationships: Baek Juho | Zuho/Lee Jaeyoon
Comments: 7
Kudos: 13





	We Are In This For Eternity

**Author's Note:**

> I realised how angsty the previous ending was so I rewrote it !
> 
> please read at your own discretion, as there's :
> 
> implied self harm  
> implied character death

Juho was annoyed. He was annoyed because the lecture hall was filled to the brim with several students sitting on the stairs. He was annoyed because he had left to use the toilet just to see a stranger sitting in his spot, talking to Jaeyoon. Juho was simply annoyed because he didn’t want to deal with people. 

He placed himself next to the stranger, towering over them with a scowl on his face. 

Jaeyoon waved at him brightly. “You’re back, Jju!” The thief turned around, locking eyes with Juho. “That’s my place.” Was all he said. He just stood there, staring the stranger down with unreadable eyes and a frown on his face. Jaeyoon was, like always, oblivious of the rising tension. “Look, Jerry” he briefly glanced at the male next to him as to confirm he got his name right “gave me a cupcake! Doesn’t it look tasty?” Jaeyoon beamed at Juho as he held out the, indeed tasty looking, dessert. “Come, sit here.” Jaeyoon slid over to the spot next to him, freeing his seat. Juho squeezed through and plopped down, crossing his arms. He grumbled something inaudible. 

Clearly, the male had been trying to hit on Jaeyoon, who was too pure to understand that. 

Halfway through their lecture, he felt the older’s head drop onto his shoulder. Juho had ignored the stranger next to him, although he could practically see how uncomfortable he was next to the dark haired student. Juho stroked a strand of Jaeyoon’s hair out of his eyes. 

The professor was continuing with his monologue, not caring that barely anyone paid attention. Juho was lost in thought as he watched his partner doze off on his shoulder. Jaeyoon looked even purer when he was sleeping. 

The couple knew they were getting quite a lot of stares. Jaeyoon was so different from Juho that it garnered attention and gained the older quite a few questions about his love life. He was bright, bubbly, social and generally just really loveable. Anyone loved Jaeyoon instantly- his bright, dimpled smile made everyone swoon over him. Jaeyoon rarely wore dark colours, he had a love for either pastel coloured fabrics or bright patterns. Juho, on the other hand, was the complete opposite. His motto seemed to be “I’ll wear black until they invent a darker color.” His dark, necklong hair was a strong contrast to Jaeyoon’s platinum blonde mane. While Jaeyoon was wearing accessories that needed no pricking, Juho had more piercings on his ears than fingers on his hands- and toes on his feet. Jaeyoon hated needles but loved Juho’s tattoos. 

Jaeyoon had snuggled closer. Juho linked their fingers gently, watching Jaeyoon’s content face with affection. He didn’t pay any attention to what the old man at the front was saying. They’d catch up today’s lecture in the evening. 

For their lunch break, Jaeyoon had insisted on eating in the cantine. Juho wasn’t all too fond of it but he couldn’t say no to the brightly shimmering eyes filled with hope. So Juho had given in, sighing in resignation as he let himself be dragged towards what he considered hell. “Aww, Jju! Stop with the long face. It’s not that bad!” Jaeyoon smiled, again, while he squished Juho’s cheeks together. The younger couldn’t help the tiny smile creeping up on his face. “That’s better.” Jaeyoon pecked his nose, making his way towards the meal which caught his attention the most.

Juho wasn't hungry, so he just followed Jaeyoon around like a lost kitten. His sharp eyes were taking in everything around them. He thought back to the first time they met. Jaeyoon had transferred from another university, he later found out that the older really didn't like the major he had chosen. 

He had ended up as Juho's roommate in the dorm and immediately turned his half of the bedroom into the complete opposite of Juho’s. Jaeyoon loved, absolutely loved, decorations. 

  
Juho had watched him put a circular mirror onto his wall, decorating the free space with artificial flowers- mainly roses and sunflowers. He didn’t know what the other ones were called. Afterwards he draped LED lights over them and placed an entirely white set of comforters onto his bed, putting fitting grey throw pillows onto his freshly made bed. The finishing touch apparently was the giant pot flower he tried to hiev onto his window sill- which he clearly couldn’t even lift a centimeter off the ground. 

The entire time over, they hadn’t spoken a word. Juho was just watching Jaeyoon turn half of the room into a completely different world. Jaeyoon turned around and, for the first time he got in, locked eyes with the younger. “Hey, uhm. Could you perhaps help me put this onto the window sill here?” His sheepish smile nearly blended Juho and within a second, he found himself lifting the plant up. “You’re so strong!” Jaeyoon exclaimed as he squeezed Juho’s clothed biceps. Something dangerous flickered through Juho’s eyes the second his new roommate touched his arm. Jaeyoon never had felt a skin as cold as Juho’s and he quickly had pulled his hand back. 

“I’m Jaeyoon! Sorry for not introducing myself earlier.” He smiled again, holding his hand out. Juho mustered it for a second before he briefly shook it. “Juho.” He said curtly before he went back to his own bed. 

Compared to Jaeyoon’s wall, Juho’s was blank of anything except for the moon phases wall hanging. That, and his all black bedding. 

After that, Jaeyoon had been intrigued by him. There was something mysterious and addicting to Juho. The way he moved around people, how he seemed to hate any crowds or how he generally just existed. It was mesmerizing, he was mesmerizing and Juho didn’t even try. His feline like eyes were sharp and quick and despite his skinny frame, Juho was strong. Stronger than anyone would think. Jaeyoon had at first felt bad for making him lift the heavy plant but Juho had done it with so much ease that Jaeyoon was left in awe. Although Juho seemed to avoid him, Jaeyoon had managed to make way through Juho’s hard shell. Maybe that’s why he had fallen for the young man or maybe Jaeyoon still wasn’t done with peeling Juho’s defense layer by layer slowly. He didn’t know and neither did Juho. 

All that mattered now, though, was that Juho was sitting next to him, pressed into his side as he eyed the other students chatter loudly. He felt his headache worsen with the sun shining through the glass roof. Jaeyoon seemed to be involved in heated discussion about something like why penguins couldn’t fly and he really wanted to be anywhere, just not directly under the sun. He felt his skin burn and if he didn’t know better, he’d have thought his skin was ablaze. Jaeyoon was oblivious to all of Juho’s distress though so the latter was damned if he interrupted Jaeyoon’s cheerful chatter. He wouldn’t put Jaeyoon into an awkward situation again, he didn’t want anyone asking his partner if he was forced to stay by Juho’s side. He silently endured the pain, just so Jaeyoon didn’t have to explain everything again. 

His bubbly partner had linked their fingers under the table, squeezing Juho’s hand every now and then. He was in a dazed state when Jaeyoon addressed him. “Jju! You’re so hot and- you’re sweating. Holy mother of flowers!” He dabbed Juho’s sweat laced forehead with a napkin. “Why didn’t you say anything? Oh my poor baby.” He cupped Juho’s face with pouty lips and guilt stricken eyes. Juho held his wrists gently. “It’s fine, I didn’t want to interrupt you.” A short, quick smile sides of Juho but he didn’t seem convinced. “Come on, let’s go. I finished eating, anyway.” 

Jaeyoon might not have seen the worried stares his friends shot him but Juho did. He wasn’t stupid.

It didn’t take long for him to recover from the heat stroke, all he had needed was a shadowy spot where the sunrays couldn’t hurt him. Still, the sun left its marks on his sensitive skin. They were in their room with the first aid kit Jaeyoon had insisted on buying. He had helped Juho out of his turtleneck shirt and his heart shattered. He had burns all over his upper body. The table had protected his legs. Although he must’ve been in incredible pain, Juho hadn’t said a word. “Don’t feel bad Yoonie, it’s not like you forced me.” The older looked up from the burns he was treating. “Stop reading my mind, Juho. That’s not really nice-” He heard him laugh. “You know I can’t read minds, Yoonie. And even if I could, I’d never read yours. You’re just an open book.” 

Silence fell between them. Juho didn’t really perceive it as uncomfortable but Jaeyoon apparently did. “I know you wouldn’t. You’d never harm me.” 

It was true. Juho never would harm him, not intentionally anyway. He was always there to protect him and Jaeyoon knew that, too. He shut people up whenever they tried to talk him out of his relationship with the dark haired male. They didn’t even want to get to know him and then were trying to dictate who Jaeyoon should be with? 

Once he had bandaged Juho’s burns and helped him put his turtleneck back on, Jaeyoon wrapped his arms around Juho’s torso. He made sure he didn’t put too much pressure onto the wounds on his partners back. He held his wrist up to Juho’s mouth. “I know you’re hungry, Jju.” He felt him stiffen under his hug. “Not sure what you mean, Jaeyoon.” 

Juho could hear the older roll his eyes. “You know exactly what I mean. Your eyes, you think I didn’t notice how you put in coloured lenses? Or how you avoid everyone even more than usual?” He heard Juho suck in a sharp breath. “The weekend is still a few days away, Jju.” Jaeyoon further pushed his wrist towards Juho’s mouth. 

“I can’t.” Juho pushed his wrist gently down. “What do you mean you can’t?” Jaeyoon was confused. They were alone. Their door was locked, not that anyone would enter on their free will anyway. Juho’s aura was scaring nearly everyone away. “No, I can’t Jaeyoon. You smell-” He was interrupted by a hurt “Hey!”    
Juho turned slightly around, masking his pain well. “You smell like that dude who hit on you.” 

“What? Who hit on me?” He blinked in confusion and tried to remember who flirted with him. Juho couldn’t help the smirk appearing on his face. “You’re so pure, Yoonie. Do you really think he got you that cupcake because he wanted to be  _ friendly _ ?” Juho could see how Jaeyoon’s face got gradually redder by the second the more he realised what he meant. “That’s- Juho- No way- I mean-” He buried his face in his hands, mumbling inaudible excuses into his hands while Juho threw his head back and laughed. Jaeyoon jumped off the bed and made a run towards the shower. Juho knew that he would be flustered for the rest of the day. 

Jaeyoon had tightly held on his hand while they were on the way to their next lecture one day. He always had a group of people follow him, which he either didn’t mind or he hid his annoyance really well. Juho just guessed that Jaeyoon was too kind hearted to say no to them. Juho had avoided the sun, like he always did, and pulled Jaeyoon with him towards the shadows. Jaeyoon had let out a squeak in joy as Juho pulled him closer to his side. “Look! A butterfly!” Jaeyoon pointed up, Juho following his finger with his eyes. Indeed, there was a beautiful butterfly minding its own business. Juho’s eyes started to hurt and he immediately looked away without saying a single word. Instead, the frown on his face deepened and he skipped further into a shadier spot. For that, he let go of Jaeyoon’s hand, which earned him a high whine and a one hundred and eighty four centimeter tall baby latched onto his side again. He was about to let out a tiny laugh when he heard one of Jaeyoon’s friends speak up. “You guys are so different from each other, literally how did you end up together? It’s like one looks at day” She pointed at Jaeyoon brightly smiling while holding a flower towards Juho he had picked up somewhere “and night” this time, she pointed at Juho, who was trying to stay out of the sun as much as he could while at the same time, giving Jaeyoon the attention he wanted and needed. 

“It’s like one of those mystical, impossible love stories, you know where there are two species like fairies and vampires. And they couldn’t be more different but they somehow fall in love and-” Jaeyoon cooed at the made up story of his friends. “Juho isn’t that adorable?” 

Juho just nodded with a small smile. His eyes lit up with warmth whenever he looked at the older. “Imagine that. Jaeyoon as a fairy and him as a vampire.” Giggles ruptured and annoyed Juho. The sun had made his head hurt terribly and the laughter wasn’t helping either. 

“Except that I am a vampire.. But Jaeyoon isn’t a fairy though.” The laughter had died down almost immediately and Jaeyoon gave him an anxious look. His lover’s friends were exchanging looks before one of them said “What?” with an awkward half smile. “Damn, you nearly got us. Anyways. Jaeyoon, we will see you later.” They waved at them and scurried off. Clearly, Juho’s remark made them uncomfortable. 

“Why did you do that, Jju?” Jaeyoon pulled him aside, stopping him in his track. He smiled, baring his teeth. His sharp canines glistened slightly. “I thought it was a good conversation starter.” Jaeyoon hit his arm lightly. “Don’t mess with me, Juho. Shouldn’t you keep this a secret? What will you do if they believe you? Oh my god. They’ll hunt you and kill you, just like in twilight-” Juho put his cold finger against Jaeyoon’s plump lips, effectively silencing him. “First of all, they won’t. And yes, I’m sure they don't believe me. The look in their eyes was just enough confirmation. They think I’m a freak, either way.” Juho pecked the corner of Jaeyoon’s eye. "Also, really Jaeyoon? Out of all vampire movies you chose Twilight?" Juho laughed loudly, even more so at Jaeyoon's pouty "It's the only vampire movie I've seen." 

Jaeyoon had found out about his true form sooner than Juho had intended. He only said “Your skin is really cold, Juho. And your eyes once turned a really bright shade of red. I just had to count one and one together.” To say that the vampire was impressed was an underestimation. Juho had been living for quite a few decades now and no one had figured his form out as fast as Jaeyoon did. After that, they had quite a few conversations about Juho’s life, which the dark haired really didn’t enjoy. Jaeyoon kept asking him to turn him into a vampire too. Juho refused even when the dimply man didn't understand why Juho was so keen on not complying with his wish. 

It’s always been the same ever since they started dating. Jaeyoon had a unique smell to him- a smell that made Juho lose control. So when he came out of the shower, smelling as fresh as usual, like a mix of flowers, honey and weirdly enough sunshine, Juho couldn't help the short, deep hiss escaping his throat. The vampire watched the water drops making their way down from Jaeyoon's hair to his neck, finally disappearing underneath the pink shirt he had thrown on. Juho hadn't realised how the contacts had failed at hiding the animalistic desire he felt to just latch onto his partner's neck and to just sink his cutting teeth into the soft skin, to just taste the sickly sweet and intoxicating blood of Jaeyoon. 

Juho could see the arterial pulsing underneath the thin layer that separated him from the red liquid. The desire to just lunge and bite Jaeyoon kept rising and it didn’t help, at all, when Jaeyoon stepped closer with his wrist outstretched. Juho hadn’t noticed how fixated his stare was on the human’s wrist until Jaeyoon put a hand onto his shoulder. His by now completely red orbs slowly looked up from the calmly pulsating arteria straight into his partner’s eyes. The smell was making it hard for him to focus, Jaeyoon’s scent was wrapping itself around him in his weak, hungry state. 

“It’s okay, Juho.” **_I trust you_ ** . Jaeyoon had always been easy to read. He was like an open book but something about the very moment was making Juho snap. He had slowly sunken his fangs into the sensitive skin, immediately holding Jaeyoon’s arm still. Even in his hungry, almost feral state, he managed to be gentle with Jaeyoon. All he felt was how dizzy he slowly got so he supported himself on Juho’s shoulder. 

Jaeyoon’s head was turning and churning as Juho kept his arm steady. He clearly was hungrier than Jaeyoon had assumed, considering he still didn’t let go of his skin. 

Jaeyoon leaned forward, resting his forehead on Juho's shoulder in an attempt to not completely fall forward. It didn't take long for Juho to pull his mouth away and the human knew, no, he could practically see the guilt radiate off Juho's figure. Instantly, Juho pulled him onto his lap and embraced him tightly, continuously telling him how sorry he was. His eyes were still red, although not as much as before. Jaeyoon knew it definitely hadn’t been enough to satisfy his partner’s thirst but it would do until the weekend, where Juho could go out and hunt for prey. 

Jaeyoon had slept through the entire afternoon, recovering from the blood loss. Juho hadn’t let go of him for a second. Instead, he had pulled Jaeyoon onto his bed, hugging the older human tightly. Juho watched him sleep silently, curled up against his chest. Jaeyoon had, unknowingly, fisted Juho’s shirt and held tightly onto the piece of fabric he had clutched. A gentle smile crept up onto Juho’s usually stoic face. He stroked a strand of hair out of Jaeyoon’s eyes with his long fingers in a soft, quick movement. 

He envied Jaeyoon, in a way. Jaeyoon was carefree, bubbly, loved, happy. Whenever Juho had to describe what warmth was like, he’d describe Jaeyoon. To him, his partner was everything he wanted to be but couldn’t. Juho felt  _ alive  _ with Jaeyoon. 

Initially, he had thought of giving in to the pleading of his partner, to just turn him into one of his own. Then, the more he thought about it, the more he resented the idea of robbing his beautiful Jaeyoon’s experience of growing old. He didn’t want to be like the shameless, misanthropic vampire who had stolen Juho’s youth, who had stolen his opportunity of having a family, of growing old with them. Juho’s mind was plagued, plagued with the vivid images of his own parents and sibling being slaughtered right in front of his eyes when he was barely twenty years old. The oh-so gracious vampire had spared his life and in return, taken his humanity. “You’re too beautiful to be wasted” He had said before he had practically ripped Juho apart with his fangs, the venom shooting through his veins and arteries, leaving him completely unable to move except for convulsing his hands. Juho had never experienced any pain as bad as the one caused by the toxin circulating through his entire body. 

Juho had practically lived under the terrifying vampire’s wing for decades, seducing and luring humans in just to suck them dry and leave their corpses behind. Juho had been taught how to heal, for his creator wanted it to use it on the master vampire himself. After thirty years, Juho had reached a point where he just couldn’t endure the pain he had caused his victims. He had learned that while he took their lives, his new power made him feel anything they felt. So when he tried to run away the first time, the master vampire had long known about his plan and had swiftly caught him. Juho had then found out that vampires, creatures that were supposedly dead, still could feel pain. And that intensely. 

“I’ve raised you, I’ve made you to the vampire you are today. Do you really think you’d have survived any minute in our world if it hadn’t been for me?” The vampire’s face was contorted in fury as he kept hitting Juho’s back with a spiked whip coated in pure gold. Humans had a terribly distorted image of vampires and of how to kill them. The only metal that came close to getting rid of the already dead was gold. Nothing but gold. Juho wouldn’t forget the hot pain that shot through his back, engulfing his entire mind and squeezing it. It had felt like his brain was being pulled through his spinal cord before it got entirely ripped out of his body. 

Juho would’ve cried, if he still had the ability to. Instead, he grabbed the cold tiles underneath his palms and knees. The spikes had lead to the gold being stuck underneath his skin, making the slashes heal slower than usual. His creator had only stopped when Juho had passed out from the pain. He had long stopped showing any sign of emotions, keeping his face in a straight mask ever since the incident.    
The great vampire had, after several weeks of leaving the fine, shimmering metal in Juho’s body, cleaned the wounds he had inflicted on the young male. Whatever Juho had done, the old vampire was steps ahead. Only then did he figure out that the man who had turned him had the ability to see into the future. 

Juho had then stopped coming up with a plan and had let his body be taken over by the rage he had build up the past decades. He had channeled his anger towards the man who had ruined his life, his family, his mind and most of all, who had stolen his purity. One day, while they were hunting in plain sight under the cloudy sky, he had seized the opportunity and lunged towards his tormentor. 

It had been a tedious, painful fight but in the end, Juho had ripped the great vampire’s head off his body, his fangs bared and coated in blood. “I’m free.” He whispered as he watched the flames reach up to the sky, burning the body of the man who had destroyed Juho. 

Juho gently shook his head to clear his mind. The lively images dissolved as Juho focused on the peaceful expression of his lover. He pressed a chaste kiss on top of Jaeyoon's head as he played with his hair tenderly. 

Jaeyoon's breath was even and Juho closed his eyes in content, gently holding the person who showed him how to feel again close to his chest. 

"Jaeyoon, I can't wear that." Juho stared at the costume in his partner's hands in horror. "Come on, Juho! It will be fun!"

Juho reluctantly took the fabric out of Jaeyoon's hands, inspecting every little detail. 

"Jaeyoon, I can't. This is-"

"Cute! You'll look so cute! Here. You have to wear these too." Jaeyoon didn't give him time to respond. "I'll help you with your make up! Quick! The party will start soon." 

Juho looked at him in horror. Jaeyoon had pushed fake fangs into his free hand and guided him to the bathroom to change. 

“Make- What kind of makeup? Party?” Jaeyoon didn’t say anything, all he did was smile at him knowingly. “You’ll look great.” With that, he had pushed Juho towards their shared bathroom.

While Jaeyoon slipped into his own costume, Juho was having a life crisis. Jaeyoon had picked him the worst costume he could’ve think of. He looked at himself in the mirror and the longer he stared at his reflection, the more Juho wanted to get rid of what he was wearing. 

“I know you’re done changing, Jju. Come out! Let me see!” Jaeyoon’s excited voice cut through the closed door. Juho sighed in resignation. There was no way he was getting out of this costume or party so he might as well try to make the best of it. He pressed his lips into a thin line the second he opened the door and locked eyes with Jaeyoon, who had let out a joyous squeal at his sight. 

Jaeyoon looked absolutely adorable in his pink body, which he had combined with an equally pink tutu, a tiara on his bright hair and wand with a star on top. His wand had been covered with fake rhinestones and whenever he swung it, the star started to light up in a bright red. If his wand hadn’t given Jaeyoon’s costume away, the huge, almost transparent pinkish purple wings did. “I’m a fairy!” Jaeyoon exclaimed happily as he twirled around once, showing off his costume. “And you’re a vampire!” He pointed at Juho with his wand, waving it around excitedly. “But- where are your fangs? Put them in.” Jaeyoon skidded to a stop in front of Juho, who was still inspecting his costume. His outfit was made of a white, silky shirt with a quilled collar and puffy sleeves, a red vest with black, ornamental swirls, wide black dress pants and a way too short cape for his tall frame. The standing collar of the cape was a slightly lighter red than the vest he was wearing. And now, he was wearing fake fangs, which truth to be told, hurt his actual fangs, just to make Jaeyoon happy. 

Two hours later and Jaeyoon had finished his masterpiece. He had used a dirty white to ashen Juho’s features and then drew with lipstick blood dripping down his chin. 

Jaeyoon himself had put on just his daily make up, added eyeshadow in the shape of glowy clouds and petals leading from the corner of his eyes towards his hair. 

All of his dislike towards his own outfit had been blown away and only Jaeyoon managed to make him feel that way. He instinctively leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss onto the tip of Jaeyoon's nose. In return, Jaeyoon wrapped his arms around Juho's neck guiding his mouth against Juho's. They just stood there, in the midst of their room, gently kissing. While Juho could've going on without a breather, Jaeyoon couldn't. He broke their kiss and pecked Juho's cheek while trying to regain his breath. 

"The party's already going on full force, let's go!" 

Juho knew he'd be out of place way before they even had set foot into the party. He just didn't like being surrounded by people who thought of him less. Nevertheless, he tried to morph his face into a mask of at least slight amusement.

The loud music was hurting his sensitive ears, though he didn't complain. Jaeyoon tightly held his hand, reassuring him that he was there, that Juho could rely on him. Jaeyoon had found his group of friends quite fast and to Juho's dismay, had left him alone with them. "I'm getting us something to drink!" Jaeyoon had whispered into his ear before disappearing in the crowd.

Juho tried to follow the conversation his partner's friends were having but they kept switching the topics faster than he could comprehend. Jaeyoon had been absent for a while now and Juho's head started to hurt more than he'd like to admit. 

"Living eternally sucks and doesn't bring as much joy as you guys think." Juho had perked up when they had started talking about an eternal life, where they wouldn't die or age. Jaeyoon's friends had dropped silent immediately the second Juho had clinked in to the conversation. "Why would you not want to live eternally? You could literally do anything you want without really dying. That's some cool shit."

Juho sighed. "Yeah maybe but what about your loved ones? You'll see them die, you'll outlive anyone you meet. How's that cool?" He didn't understand, he really couldn't understand their mindset. 

"That doesn't matter. I mean, sure it's going to be hard when you lose your family but you get over it." 

Juho was baffled. His family had been dead for over fifty years now and he still mourned them. 

He wanted to bite back so bad but Juho opted not to. "You're a whacko, do you know that?" Juho pretended to not have heard the exclamation and instead, craned his neck to see where Jaeyoon was. 

"Jaeyoon really picks up the most pitiful people." Juho gritted his teeth in an attempt to not murder them. Not that he couldn't, he was sure he could snap everyone here in half without even trying. He held back for the sake of his partner. Just as he was about to leave and search for Jaeyoon, he walked up to him with two drinks and a bright smile. Juho gratefully took the beverage from him and Jaeyoon seized the opportunity to lure a quite long kiss from him. A smile had grown on Juho's face and he tried to surpass it by sucking his lips in- to no avail. 

"Look guys! I'm a fairy" he giggled while showing off his costume, lifting the pink tutu slightly. "And Juho is a vampire. A cute vampire." Jaeyoon cooed at him. 

Juho's eyes softened at Jaeyoon’s antics, completely zoned out. He had been resting his head on Jaeyoon’s shoulder. The second his ears picked up the conversation, again, he lifted his head and the warmth he was feeling was slowly fading. “I think it’s pretty cool, too! I wish I could live eternally too. I’d want to spend it with the person I love the most.” Jaeyoon gave him a meaningful stare with a soft smile, obviously hinting at their long lasting bickering about how Juho just should turn Jaeyoon. “Well, your boyfriend here thinks it’s not nice.” 

Juho threw his head back and drowned the drink in his hand in one go. He knew he couldn’t get drunk but he’d do anything to get anywhere close to it. “I’m just saying that it’s not as great as you guys make it sound.” Juho stared right back at Jaeyoon, signalling him that he really didn’t want to have this conversation in front of his friends, which the human dressed up as a fairy understood. He changed the topic quickly. “Have you seen the new flowers on campus? They’re so heavenly beautiful!” 

Several hours and countless drinks later, Jaeyoon was wasted.  _ Truly  _ wasted. 

“You’ve had enough, Jaeyoon. Come on, give it to me.” Juho had his hand stretched out, his eyes filled with worry never left his partner’s face. “ ‘s fine Sjjjjuho. Jus~ttttttt one more.” Jaeyoon slurred, tipping his head back to drown the cup in his hand. Even in his wasted state, he was still smiling. Juho hadn’t given the older a chance to drink it, though, as he snatched the beverage out of his hand. “No, Yoonie. You barely can stand. Come on, we should head back anyway.” Juho looked at his phone to undermine his point. It was four am already and they had classes later in the noon. “Shh- hey! I wanted to drink sthat-” Jaeyoon trailed off, until he had ended it with a snort. Juho worldessly hooked his arm through Jaeyoon’s and was about to excuse themselves from his friends when one of his equally drunk friends had pulled him out of Juho's gentle hold. "Can't you see you're hurting him? Let him go. Fucking idiot." 

Jaeyoon didn't even understand what was happening as he let himself be pulled towards Juho again. He let out a giggle. Juho just narrowed his eyes and tried leading Jaeyoon away but the blonde had other plans. "Jju come on, I don't want to leave yet!" Jaeyoon pouted, pulling his hand out of Juho's. 

The vampire's head was exploding from the noise and he was too exhausted to fight back. "Whatever, Jaeyoon. You're old enough to decide what you want. I'm leaving." With that, he had turned around and stalked off. He didn't see how his partner rolled his eyes at him. 

Once Jaeyoon realised that Juho had indeed left and wasn't coming back, worry took over his clouded mind. "I should check up on him." He was about to leave when his good friend spoke up. 

"Jaeyoon, don't you realise how he's controlling you?" Jaeyoon gave him a weirded out stare. "Juho isn't controlling me at all." 

"Of course not, is that why you're going to leave the party even though you wanted to stay just three minutes ago?" In his drunk state, his friend's explanation seemed plausible. "He's always destroying our fun time, Yoonie. Ever since you started like, dating, you changed a lot."

Despite his friends efforts to keep him on the party , Jaeyoon left with a heavy heart. 

His boozed mind wandered off to when they had left social gatherings quite early because Juho didn't like it or when he didn't even bother going with him to any outing because his head was hurting. 

Jaeyoon entered their room and saw Juho lying on his bed, facing the wall. He couldn't make out his face but his stiff posture was enough of an indication that he truly wasn't feeling well. 

Jaeyoon would've understood- if he wasn't incredibly drunk. 

"You really left me alone there?" Jaeyoon had calmly asked, plopping down on his own bed. He took the tiara off his head and placed it with the wand on his nightstand. When he got no answer of his lover, anger slowly started to rise. 

"Are you mad at me? Because I didn't want to leave? So you're giving me the silent treatment?" Jaeyoon kept working himself up, fueled by the words his friends had thrown out.

Juho's head was exploding from all the noise the past four hours. Although he couldn't bleed, the dark liquid running out of his ears once he had been in the comforting silence of his room was just proving how strained his sensitive ears had been. 

So when Jaeyoon wouldn't stop basically yelling at him, he shot up and glared at him for the first time ever since they met. "I'm not giving you the silent treatment, I'm trying to rest my ears. Which, in case you forgot, are extremely sensitive right now." 

Jaeyoon exploded. He had started throwing around slurred words, some of which he barely understood himself. And Juho took them all silently, putting his hand onto one ear. He tried to ease the pain by trying to heal himself but Jaeyoon's yelling was making it worse. 

"I wanted to have a normal date with you, for once Juho! My friends were right when they said you're controlling."

Juho stared at him in disbelief. "I am  _ what _ ?"

The hurt in his voice was cutting through the thick tension in the room. Juho dropped his hand, resulting in the dark secret to flow out of his ear again. But Jaeyoon was oblivious to the wound he was inflicting on Juho with his words. "I've given you my blood plenty of times, I've respected your dislike towards the sun all the time but you- you don't even want to spend time with my friends. You don't even want to spend your life with me."

Juho didn't know what to say. At this point, the words were more cutting than the whiplashing of the grand vampire decades ago. "I always went with you to your meetups, to your parties or to your gatherings or whatever you call it. Jaeyoon, you know exactly what happens when my skin is exposed to the sun for an extended period of time. You know I never held you back from enjoying the sunshine." Juho didn't really understand why he was arguing with a clearly beyond drunk Jaeyoon. He couldn't stop himself from feeling hurt, either. Before he could continue, Jaeyoon fell into his words. "Yeah maybe I want a normal partner." 

The vampire didn't say anything else, the silence was like a heavy blanket laying on top of them. "We should just stop seeing each other for good." 

Juho's dead heart shattered. He hadn't expected Jaeyoon to soak up his friends' words so easily. Jaeyoon as well as Juho himself had expected the vampire to get angry, to start yelling back but all he did was let out an inaudible "what?"

The sudden pain set in and Juho knew then that Jaeyoon meant every single word. Drunk people usually always said what they meant, didn’t they? The suffocating pain in his chest just grew with each passing second and Juho had to get out. "You should sleep. You have lectures in a few hours."

With those last words, Juho left. Jaeyoon just angrily threw himself into his bed and he soon passed out, as if he hadn't just broken up with the person he had been dating for the past two years. 

Juho had come back to their room a few hours later and upon seeing Jaeyoon flaked out, still wearing his costume and without a blanket, he couldn't help himself. 

He put Jaeyoon's sleepwear on and tucked him in, memorising his features for the last time. He reached out to stroke a strand of the wild blonde hair away and that's when he noticed how his skin had already started to develop black spots.

Juho let out a tiny laugh in disbelief when he pulled his thin fingers back and silently made his way out of the dorm into the dark night. 

"So this is what dying feels like." He exclaimed softly, to no one but himself. His only company was the moon shining through the clouds occasionally. 

Weeks had passed and Jaeyoon hadn't seen Juho - at all. He didn’t see him at their shared lectures nor did he see him in their room. Jaeyoon’s memory was lacking of the fateful night but he recalled breaking up and saying quite a few unpleasant things to the man he loved. Guilt had nagged at him and he wanted, Jaeyoon really wanted, to make things right with the vampire but he hadn’t managed to get a hold of him ever since. 

He had researched, spent countless hours browsing the internet and reading mythology books about how his actions would be affecting Juho. And so far, Jaeyoon had only found sobering stories. He didn’t want to be the reason Juho died, so he did all he could to find him. He wouldn’t forgive himself if his own idiocy resulted in Juho’s perishing. Juho had once mentioned to him that he might have found his soulmate in Jaeyoon but he had just dismissed it, thinking that the vampire hadn’t meant it. The more he read up on the topic, though, the more he realised that Juho had been serious. 

Vampires apparently didn’t joke, at all, when it came to the person they were willing to spend the rest of their life with. 

One night, Juho had used all the strength he had left to limp towards his room, curling up on his bed. If he was going to die, then he wanted to lie under his soft covers. He felt pathetic. Juho was supposed to be a strong creature, immortal. He would laugh at the irony, if he wasn’t in a weak state. Juho had been hit by countless bullets, knives. He had lived through multiple wars and in the end, he’d die from having his heart broken. 

Juho’s pain had worsened in the weeks following the break up. He felt like he was being skinned and burned alive while someone poured hot, liquid gold into his throat. Juho was dying, something he had wanted for decades now but he hadn’t expected it to be as painful. He was facing the wall, his back Jaeyoon’s bed. Just thinking about the smiley, dimpled man he had lost his heart to was setting off another wave of pain. 

Juho let the exhaustion take over his frame and he drifted in and out of consciousness. And that’s how Jaeyoon found Juho. He hadn’t recognized him at first, shock took over Jaeyoon’s entire body. He never would’ve imagined a vampire losing weight but Juho’s frame was tinier than weeks before. The little exposed skin on his neck had black spots, some already necrotic and leaking black liquid he had never seen before. Juho’s skin had turned an ashen grey, making him look sick, if not even dead. The clothes he was wearing were too big on his small frame. Jaeyoon approached him slowly, sitting on the free space on Juho’s bed. He gently put a hand onto Juho’s shoulder, which made Juho snap back into the present. He let out a weak, pained hiss. Juho didn’t change his position despite the burning sensation Jaeyoon’s hand was causing him. Juho had no strength left. 

He just stared ahead, trying to ease the ailment by focusing on his breathing. 

Jaeyoon managed to catch a glimpse of Juho’s face and he let out a strangled, shocked sound. His face was sunken in, his cheek bones were prominent more than ever. The black spots were bigger than the ones on his neck. Some were already like small holes and the bright red rings under his eyes were a strong contrast to the dull colour of his usually shining orbs. 

When Juho averted his gaze to Jaeyoon, the human wanted to cry. There was no emotion left, no life, no light- Even the white of his eyeballs had turned black. 

Juho was dying and Jaeyoon was the reason. 

Juho’s usually pinkish lips were chapped, drained of colour. The same lips that used to curl up in a smile upon seeing Jaeyoon stayed in a frown oozing sadness and grief.

“Juho- I-” Juho squeezed his eyes shut upon hearing his name drop. Jaeyoon’s voice was like music to his ears yet at the same time, made his ears bleed quite literally. Jaeyoon didn’t know what to do. He wanted to tell Juho how sorry he was, how he didn’t mean any of what he had said, he wanted to hold him tight, play with his hair and hug him. Jaeyoon wanted to erase his pain but he didn’t know what to do, not when he saw how much his touch had hurt the vampire. Not when he saw how Juho had closed his eyes in agony when Jaeyoon had called out his name. 

So all Jaeyoon did was silently cry as he watched Juho's body shut down. He hadn't spared Jaeyoon another glance, not that it'd have helped Juho. He silently took the slow process. 

Jaeyoon wanted to do nothing more than hold him tightly. Juho had always loved being held, he had always loved it when Jaeyoon held his hand or played with his fingers. 

He had never seen Juho so eerily calm like now. Jaeyoon couldn't understand. He couldn't understand how Juho could lie there, under the blanket and not move a single muscle, how he managed to keep quiet despite the pain he was in. 

It was like Juho had given up and it scared Jaeyoon. Juho not being upset about what was happening was scaring him. This entire situation was too much to handle.

Juho wondered why Jaeyoon wouldn't leave. He tried to tell him that he was sorry for all the problems he had caused, he wanted to tell Jaeyoon how he never had wanted to push him into letting Juho drink his blood. Juho wanted to apologize for having met him but he couldn't as he was already slipping away. 

_ It's happening _ , he thought. Breathing was starting to get troublesome. Juho was barely conscious, the pain intensified in his chest, spreading around his entire body. He felt the skin rip on his face and bone crack in his jaw. 

While Juho was ringing for air for the first time in years, Jaeyoon couldn't hold back anymore. Any rational thought had been lost and he sacked onto Juho's body, holding him tight to his chest as he cried uncontrollably. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry please don't leave. Please don't go. Please" Jaeyoon's voice broke, swallowed by his own sobs as he buried his face in Juho's neck. It took Juho his entire might to move his lips. “I trusted you with the most vulnerable thing I had, Jaeyoon.” It was merely a whisper, he’d have missed it had it not been for the silent room. Jaeyoon heard, felt, how Juho had given his last breath soon after as the human tightened his hold as if it would stop the soul from leaving his body. The guilt was eating him up. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Was all the blonde managed to get out, choking on his own tears and spit. Juho's pained eyes stared emptily at the wall. 

"I didn't kill him. I didnt-" Jaeyoon's mind was already playing him tricks. "I didn't. I didn't mean to- I didn't kill him" 

He didn't let go. Instead, Jaeyoon wrapped his legs around Juho's over the blanket, as if nothing had changed. Except, that everything was different. 

Jaeyoon kept repeating the same sentences over and over, as if speaking them out loud would ease his mind, as if Juho would be back if he said them enough of times. 

Jaeyoon's tears didn't stop as he continued pressing his chest against Juho's side. Juho’s last words haunted Jaeyoon already. _ I trusted you _ . 

He didn’t know how many hours he had been crouched over Juho’s frame, Jaeyoon lost track of how long he had sat there, crying. His throat was aching and his voice rough. “I didn’t kill him. I didn’t kill him.” Jaeyoon turned Juho’s body onto his back and when he saw that his eyes were still open, the usual red orbs faded into a dark grey. He had never seen so much agony in Juho’s eyes and face. His skin had nearly completely peeled, revealing the soft, pale skin that used to shine under the moonlight. 

Night broke in and Jaeyoon had moved to his bed. He was sitting, his legs pulled up. He had wrapped his arms around his knees and buried his face in them. Every now and then he stole a glance towards Juho’s body, whose skin had completely detached itself from him. Jaeyoon had tried to swipe Juho’s eyes closed but they kept staying wide open. 

_ I trusted you with the most vulnerable thing I had, Jaeyoon _ . He pressed his hands against his ears in an attempt to shut the echoing words out. 

The second he had touched Juho's face, he had started to fall apart underneath Jaeyoon's fingers. Jaeyoon let out a loud cry, attempting to keep a hold on the dissolving body of the vampire but to no avail. All that was left of Juho was a pile of ash and the clothes he had been wearing. 

Jaeyoon felt like he was suffocating, like a part of him had been ripped away and disappeared with Juho. 

Jaeyoon hadn’t gone to any lectures the past week. He just sat on his bed, barely moving. He hadn’t slept, either. Whenever he closed his eyes, Juho’s last moments infiltrated his dreams. His friends had tried to contact him but he had turned his phone off and locked the room. He was glad he had because someone kept trying to get in. He really wouldn’t be able to explain why there was a pile of ash 

under the blanket and where his boyfriend-  _ ex _ boyfriend - had disappeared to.

  
Jaeyoon hadn’t really believed in what Juho had told him about his kind and their soulmates. He had thought that Juho just made it up. He had been too fixated on Juho not turning him than trying to understand why he had constantly refused to. 

The pent-up tension was unbearable so Jaeyoon reached for anything that could help him break the intensity. He needed to feel something, anything, other than the massive shame and remorse numbing his mind. 

Juho had said that when one found their soulmate, that their souls connected quite literally. That whatever their partner felt, the vampire would too. 

He had never told Jaeyoon what would happen, if the vampire died and their partner lived on.

"Jaeyoon if you don't open the god damn door right now, I'll kick it in!" He heard his close friend yell while rapidly knocking. 

For the first time in days, Jaeyoon moved. He heard his bones crack with each step he took. Although it had been mere seconds they felt like hours to him. He slowly unlocked the door and his friend ripped it open, making Jaeyoon stumble back. 

"The hell were you thinking Jaeyoon-  _ what happened to you _ ?!" 

Jaeyoon's lips trembled. He knew he looked terrible. His hair was a mess, he was still wearing the pyjama Juho had put him on. Jaeyoon had changed into them when he had lost him. They gave him the feeling of feeling Juho's embrace. 

His face was stained from the make up that had smeared on his face from the excessive crying. His usually warm, glimmering eyes were empty. All they held were now pain and sorrow. He didn't have enough strength to answer. He just shrugged once before he attempted to close the door. Jaeyoon didn't want to deal with anyone. He just wanted the pain to end. 

His friend didn't seem to get the hint, though. "Do you know how worried we were about you, Yoonie?" Jaeyoon stared at the ground in shame. "When you didn't return to our messages or calls- and then you turned your phone off and didn't show up to any lectures-" 

His friend pulled Jaeyoon into a tight hug, which the human didn't reciprocate. The warm, protective hold just brought up memories of Juho holding him tightly when he had hurt himself. Jaeyoon couldn't stop the tears falling, again, as a sob left his throat. 

It was almost like Jaeyoon hadn't disappeared for a week. It was almost like Jaeyoon hadn't broken down in the arms of his friend. Almost.

Jaeyoon smiled, like he always did. But it was different, as they never reached his eyes. His usually bubbly, extroverted self had completely changed. He was reserved and silent, rarely talking anymore. The same person who used to love eating just pushed the food on his plate around, occasionally poking it with his fork. 

Jaeyoon had stopped going to parties or meet ups with his friends. They reminded him of how much of a terrible person he was. 

It was like life had stopped for him when Juho had died. 

His friends hadn't asked where Juho was. They clearly assumed he had switched universities after his fight and break up with Jaeyoon until one of them asked where he was. Jaeyoon at first hadn't replied, falling completely silent. The smile he had been wearing had instantly fallen off as he stared into the distance with sad eyes. "He- uhm." 

He saw how one of them was about to open their mouth and he knew they were going to bad mouth him so he didn't think when he said "He passed away."

It seemed like the sentence had taken them all off guard, seeing how all of the four students mouths were hanging wide open in shock. Jaeyoon had averted his gaze back to the full plate in front of him, with the sun shining brightly through the glass roof of the cafeteria. When he looked up, he swore he had seen the same shiny black hair he loved to play with. 

"Juho.." Jaeyoon whispered, dropping the fork he was holding. 

"How- I mean, how- when- what happened?" 

Jaeyoon's attention was pulled towards the question and when he looked back, Juho was gone. The tiny shimmer of hope was instantly erased by disappointment. 

"I killed him." He let out, which was barely audible. His friends exchanged looks of concern before one spoke up. "You didn't, Jaeyoon. Don't say that." He didn't look up from his plate. He knew he had been the reason Juho died. Jaeyoon had murdered Juho, and that in cold blood. Knowingly.

Jaeyoon had gotten a new roommate, as the news of Juho's passing had made its way to the director. He had picked an elegant urn, where he had kept Juho's ashes. His new roommate was funny and social. 

_ So this is what Juho must've thought about me when I moved in _ , Jaeyoon thought. 

Everything reminded him of the vampire. Wherever he looked, Juho was there. 

"You know, today apparently the night sky is clear of clouds and the moon..I know you love the moon.” Juho smiled gently. “We could have a picnic. I’ll prepare something to eat and drink. What do you think?” Jaeyoon had rested his head on his hand, which he had propped up on the table they were sitting at. 

Jaeyoon’s good friend stepped closer and saw Jaeyoon talking to no one but thin air. “No, hey no. Don’t leave!” Jaeyoon let out as he reached towards Juho, who had dissolved right in front of him once more. 

His friends had caught Jaeyoon talking to empty spaces more than once. And each time, he had looked sadder than before when he realised that no one was standing there. 

Jaeyoon had isolated himself more and more over the past months. The void Juho had left in his heart was growing by the second and Jaeyoon was surprised he was still living at this point. 

His roommate soon had requested a change of dorms, as Jaeyoon’s behaviour seemed to creep him out since he was continuously clinging to Juho’s clothes whenever he wasn’t in lectures. 

Though they all had noticed the change in Jaeyoon’s behaviour, no one seemed to care. No one checked up on him, no one stopped him from hurting himself. Every day, Jaeyoon had new scars, new wounds on his arms. Every night, he’d try to ease the tension in his body by causing himself pain in any way- from beating himself to using a lighter. None of it- really none of it- seemed to make him feel alive again. His best friend turned out to be his own hands, ready to slap himself whenever he needed to replace the numbness with hurt.

Jaeyoon was back from the last lecture for the week. His heart shattered when he saw the urn broken on the floor, he wanted to cry. He curled up on his bed yet no tears seemed to flow. 

Just as he was about to cause himself pain once more, icy cold fingers weakly wrapped around his wrist. Jaeyoon's head snapped to the side and his breath got caught in his throat. Juho was kneeling on the ground, barely holding himself up. The ashen skin had completely fallen off, the black spots were still present though they weren't as dark as before. Juho's orbs had slightly turned lighter, the necrotic spots had closed and stopped leaking secret. The red rings under his eyes were still shimmering through. “What-” His face contorted in pain. “do you think” Juho rested his forehead on the mattress, his head was killing him. The light in the room was hurting his eyes. "You're doing" 

Jaeyoon thought he was dreaming. Juho had died in front of his eyes, he had turned to dust in his hands and now he felt, he truly felt the cold fingers around his wrist. 

In a matter of seconds, Jaeyoon had lifted him up and pulled him into his embrace, holding him tightly while cradling Juho's head. He had buried his nose in Juho's hair, silently inhaling his scent. 

Juho was too perplexed to move, Jaeyoon had made him rest his cheek against his buff chest. 

Jaeyoon was scared. He feared Juho would fall apart once more the second he let him go. He feared that Juho would disappear again. Jaeyoon was scared of watching Juho die a second time. 

The vampire didn't move a single bit, not when Jaeyoon tightened his hold and certainly not when the human had laid him down before hugging him tightly again. 

Jaeyoon was spooning him. The physical contact was painful, though not as horrible as weeks before. 

"I know you're just an illusion but please don't leave me again. I don't think I can take it this time." Jaeyoon's voice was tiny and raspy, as if he hadn't talked much the past days. Juho could feel the pain in the human's voice, so instinctively he held onto the arms he had wrapped around the vampire. The shirt Jaeyoon was wearing had rode up a bit, exposing the tanned skin littered with dark blue-purpleish bruises as well as yellow-greenish fading ones and ones. Pink scars, red scars. His skin was like a canvas and the wounds were his form of communicating, of displaying just how much hatred he had carried in himself- against his own being. 

Juho had stroked the scars gently with sad eyes. Having a human as a soulmate really had complicated things. The curse had hit the fragile heart of Jaeyoon like a category five typhoon, wrecking havoc in his mind. He had been slowly drowning, the pain suffocating him more with each passing day. Yet exactly that pain had allowed Juho to escape the endless void. 

"I won't leave. I promise."

Jaeyoon hadn't left him alone. He constantly was by his side supporting the vampire up anywhere he went, even if it was just the restroom. Juho was still incredibly weak, especially because he couldn't go hunting. His wounds took longer than usual to heal and it worried Jaeyoon. Neither of the two attended any lectures, as Juho couldn't cover up his wounds and hide his eyes. 

Countless of times he had rejected the offer of drinking Jaeyoon's blood. He wouldn't make the same mistake again. Juho was rather focused on taking care of the human. He was worried for Jaeyoon, worried that although he was back, Jaeyoon wouldn't be able to break the never ending cycle the curse pushed him into. 

The last straw for Juho had been when he had walked in on Jaeyoon holding the flame of a lighter onto his arm, when he heard the strained breath he had let out and when his eyes had been laced with tears which didn't spill. Juho had then decided that him being stubborn would continue hurting Jaeyoon.

Although Jaeyoon was smiling, it wasn't the same smile as before. Whenever he thought Juho wasn't looking, he was spacing out and the emptiness in his once brightly shining, happiness oozing eyes combined with his thick eyebrows pulled together in worry replaced the mask he had perfectioned on wearing in public. 

He also had turned quieter, sometimes going days without speaking. 

Juho felt responsible. Jaeyoon had developed a terrible separation anxiety. He couldn't be left alone even if it was just for three minutes. If Juho had listened to Jaeyoon, he wouldn't be experiencing this torturous plague. He would still be the happy, carefree Jaeyoon Juho had fallen in love with. 

At night, when the human was supposed to sleep, Jaeyoon was lying wide awake. His brain kept him from sleeping, as it constantly tried to tell him that Juho was gone, gone forever and that the Juho he was with was nothing but part of his mind making him up to push the guilt away. Whenever he thought Juho was sleeping, Jaeyoon let his tears silently fall. He clung to Juho's hands as if the touch was keeping him from going completely insane. 

One night, Juho couldn't pretend he was asleep anymore. The silent sob his partner had let out was like a golden arrow shooting right through his heart, setting his entire body ablaze. 

He turned around, taking Jaeyoon off guard. He had sucked in his plump lips, wet from the tears that continued dropping, his eyes widened in shock staring right into Juho's. 

Jaeyoon looked exhausted. 

Juho's heart twisted as he cupped Jaeyoon's face, trying to wipe the endless tears away. He pulled him close and Jaeyoon instantly hid his face in the crook of Juho's neck. They didn't utter a single word but Juho's actions were enough to soothe Jaeyoon's aching soul. He rubbed the human's back slowly, calmly, as he let him cry his soul out. Juho let him be until he fell asleep. 

1Jaeyoon hadn't lifted his head from its position, inhaling Juho's scent constantly. 

Once his breaths evened out, Juho let a quiet "Hold on just a little longer, Yoonie." 

It had taken Juho several weeks to completely heal. Christmas was nearing and Jaeyoon had stopped with actively hurting himself. Probably because Juho never left him alone long enough. Their bond seemed to grow with each passing day and Juho had watched Jaeyoon slowly turn back to his usual self. It was like the stronger Juho got, the more happiness Jaeyoon regained. 

"I'm going to do it." He said, to which Jaeyoon just gave him a questioning stare. "Do what, Jju?" They were sitting in the living room, the TV running silently in the background. 

"I'm going to turn you." Jaeyoon stared at him with huge eyes. He didn't say anything, he didn't move. He just sat there, frozen, because that was something he hadn't expected at all. 

"It's going to be painful, though." Jaeyoon didn't care. He snuggled closer to the vampire before he dropped his head on his lap without a warning. "Nothing can be more painful than watching you die and turn to dust, Jju." He had locked eyes with Juho at that as Juho threaded his fingers through Jaeyoon’s soft hair. “When?” Jaeyoon’s voice was filled with hope, which earned him a gentle chuckle. “When you feel better.” 

Jaeyoon wrapped his arms around Juho’s neck and pulled him closer. “I feel better, never been this good.” He murmured against the vampires lips before Juho leaned in and stole a slow kiss from him. Jaeyoon sat up, his lips never leaving Juho’s as he gently pushed him back. 

Jaeyoon settled in Juho's lap, wrapping his legs around his hip before he broke the kiss with a gentle peck. He hid his face in the crook of Juho's neck, his hands playing with his shiny locks. Jaeyoon was content. He was happy. 

He heard Juho let out a small laugh, his huge hands rubbing soothingly Jaeyoon's back up and down in a slow motion.

They stayed like that for the rest of the day, just leaving their comforting embrace for fulfilling their needs.

A week before Christmas, Juho kept his promise. He had prepared Jaeyoon mentally as best as he could as well as himself. With turning Jaeyoon, he'd be breaking the oath he had given to no one but himself.

Jaeyoon had been like a child, giddily asking Juho multiple times a day when he'd bite him. When the time came, Jaeyoon dramatically revealed his neck. Juho laughed at his antics and guided him towards the bed, where he had made space for the two of them. 

"Are you sure about this?" He gave Jaeyoon a chance to stop but the human was determined. "I am. Now bite me, you sexy thing." Juho let out a loud laugh at that. "And while you're at it, you can do that mating thing too, you know." 

Jaeyoon looked him dead in the eye before he unbuttoned the shirt he was wearing. "It doesn't work that way, unless you want it to be one sided?" Juho's fingers grazed Jaeyoon's features, feeling the warm skin for the last time. Soon, he would be as cold as Juho. 

"No, we going through this bonding thing together. " He had exclaimed with a straight face before he broke out in a grin. 

Juho pressed his lips onto Jaeyoon's plump ones, distracting the human for a bit until he made his way down his neck. Juho halted, mere millimeters away from the inviting, pulsing arteria. His fangs had automatically bared themselves and his gums started to itch. In a matter of seconds, he had sunken them in. Jaeyoon's hands instantly had shot up to grab Juho's shirt on his back, clawing the fabric.

As soon as the fangs had pierced his skin, flaming hot pain shot through his body. Juho had warned him but he had, again, dismissed it. He didn't feel anything except for the pulsating pain spreading slowly. He didn't feel Juho pull away nor did he feel being laid down. Panic washed over him when he started to see everything distorted. 

Juho had settled next to Jaeyoon, whose body was fighting the venom circulating in his blood system. Juho had prepared for this, he had prepared for the pain and for the exhausting task he had put upon himself.

When Jaeyoon let out a scream, one he wouldn't remember, Juho had placed both his hands onto his soulmates torso and chest. He concentrated on locating the toxin, following its trace to ease the pain. Instantly, Jaeyoon's painfully contorted face relaxed and he had passed out. Instead, Juho's body started to ache and he was experiencing his own turning one more time. 

He had leaned his head between his two hands on Jaeyoon's body, resting his forehead without adding too much pressure. 

He stayed like that for nearly nine days. It had taken nine days for Jaeyoon to be completely stripped of his human form.

Jaeyoon's tan skin had taken an ashen undertone and the warmth had disappeared gradually. When Jaeyoon's eyes shot open, the brown orbs had lightened to a bright red. Juho gave him a tiny smile before his arms gave out. Waves of exhaustion washed over him and Jaeyoon shot up, catching Juho's sacking body with ease. 

Jaeyoon held Juho to his chest, who was breathing heavily. He knew what Juho had done and he was eternally grateful. Jaeyoon was happy, genuinely happy.

It had been snowing when Jaeyoon had opened his eyes again. When he looked out the window after tucking Juho in, the sun was shining brightly. 

Jaeyoon let out a hiss at that, shielding his eyes from the bright rays. Instantly, clouds formed and hid the sun. "Jaeyoon…" Upon hearing Juho's meek voice, he looked at him. Seeing just the mop of hair and nose peek out beneath the blanket, Jaeyoon fondly smiled. "Yeah?" 

"Your power. You can control the weather." 

He was surprised. Based on what Juho had said, mastering and acquiring a power was a tedious task, which could take more than half a century. He didn't complain, though, not when he saw how Juho had passed out after finishing his sentence. 

He was in for an eternal life with Juho,  _ his _ Juho, and he knew he wouldn't regret it. 

**Author's Note:**

> So as it's known by now, I'm worried of the soft content I write.
> 
> I hope you like this ending better.  
> Any feedback is welcome!


End file.
